


The joys of losing yourself to your demons

by DarkCaller



Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: Gen, Ghosts, Homebrew Content, NPCs - Freeform, Tiefling, human wizard - Freeform, i wish i had a beta reader to tell me what to put in the tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-05-01 22:17:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19186468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkCaller/pseuds/DarkCaller
Summary: Excalibur was cursed by his best friend to live forever as a demon- his fiendish blood amplified and restrained all at once as a demon of possession. Guardian of the designated kin, Adolamin Swordhand, the rouge is forced to abide by the laws of the accidental contract... but when he goes against it and lets his old instincts take hold it doesn't end as he or anyone would expect.(a "what if" story i wrote about a series of events in the campaign. This is one of the few non-cannon stories i wrote for my players and the "extended ending" was written while i was so tired and unaware of myself and surroundings i didn't know i had continued the story. We've coined this as "sleep drunk" and that part of my brain is a evil and dark place that i am unable to even look at in the morning. however this was not one of those times. enjoy some character study i guess?)





	The joys of losing yourself to your demons

**Author's Note:**

> Its 2am so i didn't remove the *s i used to make italics in discord.

He wasn’t going to last much longer. He held his breath as his charge stared wide eyed and perhaps disbelievingly up at the stands. This couldn’t be real right? This couldn’t possibly be something that was happening * _again_ *. Fearinta was enough- her passive aggressive anger towards him scared him (he let it scar him, he could have done something but he didn’t, because he couldn’t let himself ever forget that SHE was *angry* with HIM) and he just wasn’t sure how he was going to survive not just one more but both of his former friends.

                “DADDY!” Amina had cried out, tears floating behind her as she threw herself into her farther. Excalibur wasn’t even sure if the tears hit the dirt floor of the big top before she was up there.

The Asmiar caught sight of her mother and any composure the woman had was gone. She was embraced by both her parents, her wings enveloping them protectively. The other specters, ghosts, and shadows watched with soft smiles- a family reunited.

*I’m dreaming… right Ex?*

Excalibur blinked at the wizard’s thoughts. The guardian was so consumed by his own emotions he forgot about his charge’s. Carefully prying at the walls Adolamin always seemed to have up he discovered an internal war of emotions- sadness, joy, hope (?) and what the teifling could only guess was excitement. Carding a clawed hand though his faded locks the guardian sighed within the young man’s mind.

                “No… this is real, Adolamin.” both he and the wizard seemed to tense and relax at the same time. “That’s the ghost of Agathaw Swordhand.”

The demon was thrown into a panic as the wizard, wailing rather than making any coherent sound, quiet latterly ran up to the bleachers and jumped strait up. The boy stuck the landing and also threw himself at the one elder he respected. Down below hiding in the dirt Excalibur could hear Adolamin babbling and eventually gathering himself enough to remember to breathe. Agathaw laughed that old man laugh he always had and that was it. Excalibur couldn’t bare this anymore- if his old farther figure and long dead best friend would catch him he would die, just fall over and parish.

A yellow green cloud fled the big top tent, unnoticed and unhindered. It mingled with the fog that had summoned the accursed attraction as Excalibur attempted to stay calm.

*Fearinta was angry- is STILL angry. I can’t upset them, they are so happy I can’t be there I can’t-*

He rambled in his mind as the cloud twisted and thrashed; the teifling was losing it and if he didn’t calm down he’ll- the cloud coalesced and dropped the demon into the wet dirt. At first he didn’t move, choosing to lay there and maybe sleep or better yet vanish, but soon that *itch*- the curse- that ordered –begged- him to stay near Adolamin –any swordhand. He wouldn’t lie to himself anymore- sent an uncomfortable burning down his spine and to the tip of his tail. He buried the feathered appendage under the mud to sooth the sensation but the feathers in his hair started to burn.

He hated this. He hated being cursed, he hated living forever, he hated these stupid feathers, he hated the circus, he hated the pupper for bringing them here, he hated being alone in this god forsaken fog, he hated how his jacket was getting wet, he hated life, death, the past, the present, **himself**, and he hated Aga-

                “The fuck is wrong with you now?” green eyes pierced dangerously into the back of the teifling.

Adolamin had noticed Excalibur was gone once he realized he was being an idiot. After talking with his grand farther the specter asked about the family guardian and now here he was fully prepared to drag him by the horns back to the tent.

He waited for a response, the night air cold and empty now that he was out of the big top. When he didn’t get an answer he was tempted to go back and let the fiend lie in the dirt but he knew what was wrong with the teifling- he knew Excalibur was running from the past.

They stayed in the fog for a few more moments before Adolamin fell into the grey and laid beside the elder. He could feel the demon relax but he refused to face the swordhand. The pair could hear the circus begin but neither made any motion to move.

                “He asked about you.” The human stated planly.

                “Of course he did…” the fiend muttered into the dirt.

Adolamin rolled his head to the side, no longer staring up at the moonless sky and instead faced his guardian. His jacket was soaked from the fog he more than likely clouded his way though and he was still semi curled in on himself, claws tangled in hair but the smell of copper caught him before the question of why came to mind. Fuck, why did he have to deal with emotions? He fucking hated emotions.

                “Tell me whats wrong.” the swordhand’s voice was demanding and stern- this was an order.

Adolamin saw Excalibur flinch and noticed the feathers rise just enough that he could distinguish them from the dull brown tuffs of hair. The claws moved from his scalp to his sides and a growl or maybe a low groan of pain reverberated from him- he could feel it in the dirt it was so deep and low. The wizard wasn’t deterred by it, but he didn’t want to repeat himself just yet.

                “Go fuck yourself Swordhand.” Excalibur grounded out between clenched teeth.

Adolamin sat up and was about to swear back when he saw those claws burry themselves into the guardian’s sides, a wet patch blooming from the fiend’s hand.

                “Go fuck yourself, your family line, and every fucking * _good deed_ * you have ever done.” Excalibur barked into the dirt, tears running down his cheeks as he curled even tighter into a ball.

                “You’re not getting your way this time, you ungrateful BRAT!”

There was a beat, the sound of the fiend chocking down pain and the echo of his words fleeting though the air.

                “Wanna bet?”

To be fair, maybe that was the wrong thing to say. Honestly Adolamin was prepared for anything and if we all understand how the tragedy that is Excalibur’s situation functions he really didn’t have anything to worry about or fear….

But * _God damn_ * if he wasn’t spooked right now.

He was shoved down onto the ground, back pressed so hard into the dirt he could feel it though the layers of cloth and force magic that surrounded him. All he saw was a single bright –burning- yellow eye that seemed to glow with so much emotion for a second he thought he was in danger. There was hot breath going down his throat though his parted lips –he vaguely remembered crying out from being shoved so hard he was sure there was an Adolamin shaped hole in the ground- and claws digging into his arms.

                “You think you’re all that don’t ya, Swordhand?” that was a very concerning sound. Excalibur’s voice was so gravely he wasn’t sure it WAS Excalibur talking.

                “Look at me, Avatar of Extra! I got a family guardian that I treat like a puppy on a leash.” His voice had double- no, tripled. The brunette was positive there were three excaliburs talking at once.

                “I can make it do whatever I fucking want- wanna see him do a trick?” Now Adolamin regretted his words. *Now* it was clear he had pushed the fiend too far.

He felt himself gasp as his lunged breathed in the yellow green gas. His hands flew to his neck- he felt like he was chocking but on what he wasn’t sure. His body ached and he felt light headed then all at once it went away. The human found himself floating within his own mind.

*”Wanna bet?” SURE! Lets make a bet, Swordhand!*

The voice echoed painfully in his mind. He wasn’t sure what was happening- normally he could still hear and see when Excalibur took over him but all he saw was darkness.

*I bet you don’t know how to fucking swim. Or fly. Ha… HAHA! BAHAHA!*

Adolamin felt sick- he knew Excalibur couldn’t hurt him but now that he thought about it there wasn’t a rule about Excalibur setting him up to get hurt. The decapitated head of his construct doppelganger flashed before his mind’s eye.

                “Excalibur please listen-“ he started, ashamed of the actual fear in his voice. “-I just want to help!”

*you want to help, Swordhand? That’s very kind of you- TOO BAD I DIDN’T ASK!*

                “You didn’t ask for a lot of shit!” Adolamin yelled into the void. He felt his body stop… whatever it was doing. Yes, good! Thinking fast he tried to gain some control of the situation.

                “You didn’t ask to be my guardian. You didn’t get a choice in that…” words were hard. Feelings were difficult. Damn it all to hell, why did his life ride on this of all things?

*You’re right… was fucking tricked by my best friend.*

                “It was an accident and you know It.” he dared to force some aggression into his tone and immediately he felt weightless like he was- “YOU TOOK MY FEATHER FALL BOOTS OFF?”

There wasn’t a response as his body hit something *hard*. Suddenly the darkness faded and it took all of his will power NOT to gasp as salt stung his eyes, water surrounding him.

*I know it was an accident. That doesn’t change the fact I CAN’T DIE. I CAN’T LIVE! I CAN’T MOVE ON!*

Adolamin felt control return to him. His mind was grasping at straws for spells that could save him and it was coming up short.

*Do you know what its like to hate your best friend for something they didn’t mean to do?*

His lungs burned and his vision was getting dark. It was then he noticed Excalibur’s boon; he felt like it was going to take some time before he died… Excalibur intended to torture him it seemed…

*”Its okay Agathaw, I forgive you for RUINING MY LIFE!” imagine if that was Amina, or Rurik…*

He couldn’t. He couldn’t imagine giving enough of a damn about them that they had any power to hurt him. It was sort of a moment of clarity for Adolamin: he didn’t care enough about the people in his life to relate to Excalibur… and he had an out.

Back at the big top Amina laughs and smiles as her parents cheer at the performance. All her joy vanished when Adolamin’s voice screamed ‘help’ in her mind. She gasped and dropped her popcorn. She heard William and Wilma ask what the matter was but she didn’t have time to explain. She flew out of the tent, Ardor and Wellby at her back. The ocean was near by- to the east she was sure. Nicolas tagged along as well, catching Adolamin’s scent as he began to lead the way.

*You want to know whats wrong, Swordhand? I FUCKING EXIST!*

Adolamin gasped, his lungs overwhelming him. He screamed uselessly as he sunk deeper and deeper into the water.

*I HATE MY BEST FRIEND! THE LOVE OF MY LIFE IS ANGRY BECAUSE OF ME! I FUCKED UP SWORDHAND!*

The demon screamed in his charge’s mind as they finally hit some sort of sand bank or reef or something. He wasn’t moving.

*I gave my EVERYTHING for all the WRONG things! I could never do anything right and here I am…*

Adolamin was still, the ocean waves above lightly pushing the sand around his dying form.

*…still doing everything wrong. Still just some sort of killing machine…*

There was a splash as something dived into the water. Several long moments later the swordhand’s body was scooped up by a very fish like Amina. She didn’t notice the gaseous form that clung to the sand as she rose back up to the surface. He wouldn’t know what happened to Adolamin- if he had drowned, if he was alive and livid, or if they were looking for him. He was selfish and tired… he just wanted to move on…

He just wanted to forget how much of Agathaw he saw in Adolaimn, to forget how Amina just wanted to know more about her farther and he * _just couldn’t tell her_ *, and he just wanted to stop knowing Fearinta was no longer happy because * _she knew he was alive_ *. He just wanted to move on, to morn and keep moving forward but he couldn’t. He had to relive every story he told William’s daughter, hold back every emotion he had when he saw Agathaw in Adolamin- *FELT* Agathaw in every once of magic that boy pumped into wands, staffs, and foes, and he wasn’t allowed to be happy that Fearinta had moved on *because. She. Hadn’t.* and now she never will. She will never morn him, she would never accept that he was gone, she would never move on and go about her life *because he can’t DIE.*

                “Bastard…” the gaseous form of Excalibur of Crax Archania whispered as it dissolved into the sand.

And the thing was he wasn’t sure if he was calling himself that or not. It would be weeks until he woke up to someone’s hand grabbing fistfuls of the sand he had subconsciously possessed and letting it slip between their fingers. The fiend was awake but didn’t move. He was numb from the burning pain of the curse and had welcomed the lack of feeling that was being sand but as the person shifted their hand though the course stones again he felt the warmth of the hand, the smoothing touch that eased the burn of the curse… this was a Swordhand.

                “You know…” Adolamin’s voice held the weight of being too wise and too old. “I don’t blame you…” something about his tone just wasn’t right. It held something the fiend couldn’t place.

The sand slipped through his fingers again, the motion calm and repetitive. There wasn’t any anger, any malicious or even an ounce of murderous intent. Excalibur didn’t trust this at all.

                “I hate myself too, Bury.” The hand made a pile out of the sand before gently, hesitantly, placing itself over the small mound.

Excalibur chocked. He didn’t want-no… he did… he wanted this… he wanted to have this talk with Agathaw but he didn’t want Adolamin to witness it. He didn’t want… did he want to be open? He wasn’t sure right now…

As the fiend contemplated this the possessed Swordhand laid down in the sand. After he heard what had happened Agathaw knew what had to be done, he just hoped his former best friend and partner in crime was willing to hear him out. The elder knew the younger Swordhand had no chance of getting any kind of traction with the tiefling- he had planned it that way. Unfortunately it seemed the emotionally detached charge had gone and made a mess of things.

*Well fuck you too, grandpa!*

Agathaw chuckled and carded his hand though the slowly growing pile of sand beside him.

                “Hush, I have just as much free reign of your body as Excalibur and then some.” The smile on his face was unmistakably Agathaw’s shit eating grin of victory.

Rolling his head to the side the smile shifted just enough from shit eating to comforting as he saw the sand form the head and arms of his old friend. The pair stared at each other for a moment, Agathaw carding his hand though the sandy hair of the other.

                “I can’t do this Agathaw…” head nuzzling the offered hand, Excalibur slowly formed more of himself from the sand and bits of rock of the beach.

                “Take your time. The boy is mostly asleep. It’ll be just you and me in a few moments.”

And a few moments later Excalibur and Agathaw were alone on the beach, the demon no longer possessing the sand and the ghost fisting a hand into said demon’s jacket. Excalibur was tempted to just pretend there was nothing wrong but he wanted this talk- he wanted to no longer hate him.

                “You really messed yourself up here, Bury…” the swordhand’s fingers rubbed at the improperly healed self-inflicted scars. “and here…” those same fingers made their way to the fiend’s neck and traced the claw marks. “And-“ Agathaw was cut off by the gentle grasp around his wrist. Excalibur got the point, he needed to stop doing that.

                “Why do you scar yourself? Pretty sure life and every clawed monster in existence did that for you looong ago.” There was a hint of humor in Adolamin’s voice as Agathaw’s echoed around it. This was going to take some getting used to.

                “It’s hard to forget your mistakes if you have reminders…” the fiend buried one horn into the sand and sighed. He wasn’t used to being open like this.

He was pulled from his thoughts when a pair of hands cupped his face. The touch was comforting and he almost let himself slip into that comfort until he realized these hands did not belong to Agathaw. His eyes shot open and narrowed dangerously at the cloudy blue eyes before him. A stern ‘no’ smacked Agathaw –least he pantomimed being smacked, letting out a soft sound of pain- as the ghost let out a chuckle.

                “You’re no fun. You used to be fun.” Agathaw didn’t remove his hands.

                “That’s not your body. Adolamin is like my child. *Fuck* no.” the dead pan reply sent Agathaw howling.

                “Fair, fair… besides…” Agathaw pressed his forehead to Excalibur’s, inciting a growl. “You care too much about him to join in on this game I’m playing.”

Yellow eyes dimmed after a second of understanding. *You care too much to willing hurt the boy.* the very recent memory of Excalibur throwing Adolamin off of a cliff felt like a twist of a knife.

The fiend curled in on himself and hissed but the human’s grip on his head kept him from burying it in the sand like he wanted. He struggled against the grip at first before sighing in defeat. He was going to face this head on rather his emotions liked it or not. A quiet ‘thanks’ escaped the younger but his eyes refused to brighten.

                “You need to let yourself be angry my friend.” Agathaw’s hand reached the base of one of the teifling’s horns. He chuckled when the glare met him. “You hurt people when you bottle it up. You hurt *yourself* when you think you deserve pain instead of-“

                “Instead of what Agate?” the calm in his voice did not fool the ghost. The claw at his grandson’s heart was not left unnoticed. “What emotion were you going to say? We both know it’s not happiness.”

                “AH! But you see-“a swift yank on the horn that was buried in the sand and some leverage from the demon’s knee jerk reaction to grip at things when his horns are touched pulled the Swordhands up and onto the guardian, pinning him to the sand in a painful position. “- you DO deserve to be happy X.”

Any attempt at a growl hurt his twisted lungs so all he could muster was a glare off into the distance and a bared fang.

                “All you ever did was the right thing and life decided to punish you for it. But what did you do?”

Excalibur sighed and grumbled a reply. His horn got a very gentle tug and he hissed more out of annoyance than pain. “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.”

                “I didn’t care. I did the right thing anyway…” the weight on top of him was gone so he rolled onto his back properly and folded his arms. He thought about clouding away but then his emotions would win yet again.

                “That’s right! You saved the day, you saved the babe, and you saved me from constant boredom.”

                “Yeah, I also became a forgotten memory, a reason to be angry, and drowned your grandson.”

Agathaw kicked his legs up and let gravity slam Adolamin down onto Excalibur right where it mattered. He sat up and cried out and swore in primordial- his voice like a thunder clap. The fiend grabbed at the swordhand with dull claws that seemed to smooth out the more he tried to inflict any amount of pain.

                “Fuck… you…”

                “I mean that was the plan earlier.” Agathaw got thrown off of Excalibur’s lap before he could even finish his sentence. He landed with a roll and promptly sat up, a mage hand reaching out and grabbing Excalibur by the collar as he was digging himself into the sand.

                “Sorry, sorry…” he sighed as his best friend starred at him with hurt eyes. “Forgot…” he dispelled the mage hand and they were back at square one- Excalibur not sure if he wanted to continue and Adolamin awake and nagging.

*what the HELL! You said he would get pissed when I suggested flirting with him and here YOU are-*

                “I FORGOT! Go back to sleep boy.” Agathaw racked his nails though his hair.

The pair flirted with each other all the time- hell Excalibur and him would throw themselves at the other just to get a rise out of William. It had been too long, he wanted his friend back- wanted those moments when they were close enough people questioned it and they would say anything they wanted.

Now it was too much. The demon had feelings for him, he knew, and the curse made everything worse.

*yeah and you using MY BODY isn’t helping, old man.*

Agathaw slowly stood up and marched to the ocean.

*WAIT WAIT STOP NO DO PHYSICALLY N O T-*

                “Agathaw?” Excalibur glanced back when he heard the gargling noises. Agathaw was holding his-Adolamin’s head in the ocean.

Instinctively the guardian was yanking the human out of the water, but he simply frowned then sighed, saying this isn’t working.

                “You’re right. YOU’RE ON WILLY!” Agathaw shouted up at nothing as Excalibur dropped him into the sand, panic in his eyes as his head shot up, looking for something to dive bomb him from the air.

                “HA! Got ya.” He stood and dusted himself off. “Boccobe doesn’t have domain over his soul, just mine.”

                “Adolamin pulled his Avatar card, huh?” he kicked at the sand once Excalibur was sure he was in the clear.

                “mhmm. He wants you to be better.” This was met with a laugh and a hard kick into the sand.

                “Hate to disappoint you, Swordhand, but your guardian is a piece of shit.”

The two stood in the sand and starred out at the ocean. It was becoming sunset and the strange calmness of Agathaw’s ghost hit the fiend again as it did earlier- he wanted to lie down and enjoy his presence. But that’s not why they’re here and he is honestly tired of his own ass right now.

                “What do I gatta do to get you to stop kicking yourself, Bury?”

                Excalibur sighed and tilted his head to stare out at the darkening sky. “Jump in my head so I don’t have to admit anything…”

                Agathaw shook his head. “That’s not how you get your emotions out there in the open.”

It was quiet again. Adolamin had gone dormant then asleep once more so Agathaw dared to move closer to his old friend. After a moment the rouge took a side step closer as well.

                “I just…” he started before reaching up to his head, claws tempting to dig at his scalp but he willed them to gently card their way through his locks. “I fucked up. Did stupid shit because I could.”

Agathaw looked at him with listening eyes- eyes not too wide but big enough to want to know more.

                “Its my fault… so many…” the teifling chocked again and willed his hand to unclench his own horn. “Its my fault so many idiots joined the sorcerer. Its my fault he has so many under his command.”

                “If I understand right he came to you after Fea was dragged away from the time and space cavern.” Glancing at the ground the wizard reached into the boy’s cloak and pulled out his familiar book. He smiled at the tome before opening it and tearing out a few papers. “Hes a man that preys on people when they are most vulnerable.”

                “Hes also a man of his word. He cares about every one of those misguided fools.” His hand slipped from his hair to reach over and trace along his neck. Agathaw nodded as he stepped forward and set the paper boat adrift.

                “I don’t know what to think of him. He takes care of his own but plans to sacrifice them all.”

The boat sailed out into the waters a few feet into the waves before the paper took on water and it sunk.

                “I hate him.” the human folded a bird as he talked. “You either love someone or you don’t. Hell *we* loved each other enough to know where the line was. He doesn’t seem to know a line exists.”

The pair grew silent again. As the sun finally set the paper bird was thrown into the air and set flying on the breeze. The sound of the ocean and the night life of the beach slowly over took the quiet.

                “I banged him.” Excalibur mutters to the wind.

                Agathaw sputtered for a moment. “What?”

                “Sex Agate. Sorcerer fucked my brains out and I was too stupid to realize he loved me so he could have power over me.” Excalibur sat down on the beach, tossing a rock into the water. “Did stupid shit because I could, remember?”

The Swordhand was angry. Excailbur’s ass belonged to him, not this mysterious ass hat who took advantage of people-

                “Wanna know the worst part? All consensual.” Another rock splashed and blooped into the water. “One time I did the fucking and he liked it so much he didn’t top ever again.”

Agathaw took that in and sat down in the sand. He knew what Excalibur was saying. “I did all the work and gave everything I had to him.” The teifling’s eyes were still dull orbs that didn’t show any life now. They just reflected the last ounces of natural light the ocean filtered to them. He wanted to ask questions but he knew the answers. *I liked it, he liked it, I felt loved and I guess he did too.* The idea of someone using Excalibur- even it was mutual and consensual- just angered him.

                “Whoa! Easy there!” the teifling patted the flames that licked at Adolamin’s cloak. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-“

                “You said he loved you so he had power over you. Explain.” When Crax Archania’s leader used his leader tone you did what he said. This wasn’t an order from the demon’s ‘master’ or a tug on some metaphorical leash- this was a commander issuing orders to him.

                Excalibur hesitated at first before closing his eyes and tracing his neck scar again. “The closer you are to someone with one of those marks the literal closer you get. We… we had a link after the first time…” the fiend glanced at the ocean, claws itching at the pinked flesh. “And the link just got stronger and stronger.”

                “He had sex with you so he could read your mind?”

                “He had sex with me so one day we would be one mind…” Excalibur let that sink in before adding “and it worked. That’s how I found out the truth and how he knew I didn’t want to be part of his plans anymore.” Another pause. “And… I think we still are… one.”

He thought he would feel sick revealing this to someone but he felt light. Like- like if he kept talking all the weight would leave him and he could-

                “You didn’t have to have sex to be close with someone to make the mark stronger. You could just be *close*. There were a group of friends who took naps together in the main room of the tower every day. They all knew if the other was sad, what made them sad, and how to cheer them up. Not only that but the *power* from the mark grew stronger too…it was like the marks relied on bonds or some sentimental something.” he continued to ramble. He cut off his thoughts every time a new reason to keep talking came to mind.

*I could be free of guilt. I could be weak and it’ll be alright. I could live for just a small moment…*

                “It’s my fault the empathetic link he can give out can evolve. He got that ability from some chick who taught him a bunch of spells- they were close like siblings until she died of some illness The Sorcerer promptly destroyed.”

Agathaw let his friend go- he needed this, he could see it as the light finally started to return. Maybe it was the encroaching darkness or perhaps Excalibur let his guard down and the wizard’s charm had gotten the better of him but what ever it was he knew this would all end if he opened his mouth. Excalibur was finally comfortable and he wasn’t going to ruin it if he could help it. least not yet.

                “You can pass any ability you get from becoming one with someone to another person. All his minions pass their new power to him once they all agree to do it. He can do just about anything, Agathaw and…”

Excalibur looked over at his old friend and could see the fog leave Adolamin’s eyes. He frowned as Agathaw reached out and brought their foreheads together again.

                “Whats wrong?” his voice was soft and assuring as his will over the body grew weaker.

                The fiend sighed. “I blame myself for everything…” Excalibur breathed as he continued to watch tired green slowly emerged from a shallow blue haze.

                “What do you deserve?” there was more Adolamin than Agathaw there.

                “Happiness. To be angry…” he paused and beat down every urge he had to grab Agathaw’s face and kiss him- in the dark he couldn’t even tell it was Adolamin. “…to be forgiven…”

That’s what he wanted to hear. The ghost smiled and brought his old friend as close as possible, giving him a tight clinging hug. He didn’t want to go but Boccobe only gave them this time and no more. Excalibur clung back, claws fisting into Adolamin’s robes; he didn’t want this to end, he had finally began to move on and now he could morn but…

                “Possess a whore next time you fuck…” the fiend muttered into his charge’s shoulder as the boy went limp.

Excalibur sat that way with the dead weight that was a drained and sleeping Adolamin Swordhand for a moment. Eventually he sucked in a breath and scooped the young man up into his arms. He was Adolamin’s Guardian again- not the angry fiend who had too much on his chest or the forgotten friend who just wanted to accept he deserved better. Excalibur wandered until he spotted the camp site he knew would be waiting for Adolamin. Amina was curled up with the pupper, the vigilante’s head up on her wing like a sentry. By the way his ear flicked Nicolas knew the pair had arrived so the fiend didn’t bother sneaking. He placed the now snoring wizard into one of the bed rolls and petted his head. He really did care too much about him.

As he lamented on his mistakes, his mind beginning to wander where it shouldn’t, a cold breeze caught him off guard and for a moment he thought he heard a far too happy, reassuring “Welcome home”. A few tears fell as he rubbed his neck and smiled at the sky.

                “Yeah, I’m home Willy…” an unexplained sense of calm pinged from Fearinta and he let out a sigh. “I’m home…”


End file.
